Several years ago we had a manners class for 3rd-5th graders as part of our children’s ministry. It was our intent to augment and refine a child’s basic understanding of etiquette. Although it was a successful effort in many ways, we were amazed that we needed to teach many of them how to hold their eating utensils before we could talk about proper table manners. Apparently, this is not a prerequisite for fast food or current family dining. So, why does it come as a surprise that many of our families don’t understand what R.S.V.P. means?
Church event after event is planned that requires some indication as to whether the invited ones will be present. A response is requested by a certain date. After limited replies, we start calling the invitees to try to determine who might be planning to attend. In the meantime, a commitment to final plans for food etc. has to be made. I am not clairvoyant, but I often have to pretend that I have this special talent if we are to go forth with the activity. On Sunday, twenty-five third graders are to receive Bibles during the 8:30 worship service. This is to be followed by a brunch for the student and their parents and a time for discovering how one navigates through the Bible. I would think that this might be an important event in the life of a family. Although some have indicated that they will attend, many have been silent about their intent. Others have made other plans. It would seem that Emily Post needs to be required reading in many of our homes or do we need to submit to this cultural trend and order out when the group arrives?
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4 comments:
Jean, you are so right. Our consumer society has conditioned people to expect they can go/do what they want when they want without having to make plans or notify someone. Any more I think you have to spell it out. For instance, for the Bible brunch, instead of an R.S.V.P. you might put "I NEED TO KNOW BY (date)IF YOU ARE ATTENDING OR IF YOU CONSIDER THIS EVENT TO NOT BE AS IMPORTANT FOR YOUR CHILD AS SOME OTHER OPPORTUNITY. CALL or EMAIL at.... :)
Glad to have your thoughts. You are right the term and the act of RSVP are outdated. Some would say that I am, also. I will try to be more specific in the future, but forgive me if I am not overly optimistic about better results.
Amy Vanderbilt shares your optimism for better results and hopes that you do not abandon any of the "Old School" methods of proper communication. Stick to your guns and challenge people to want to know more. Tom
On the other hand, I received an invitation to an event I would have liked to attend, but could not. The invitation included an RSVP, but no telephone number, mailing address or contact number. I felt like such an oaf.
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